A Few Lifestyle Tips I have Gained From my IBS Journey

 I just wanted to share a little glimpse into my journey with poor health and IBS. I see so many of you struggling everyday and it hurts my heart. I wanted to share my story in hopes it would give some of you hope and send you on the path I took.

I have had IBS since I was four years old. I went from age 4-16 without a diagnosis. My GI Specialist performed many tests every year and the best answer he had was maybe it was the drainage from my allergies. At 16 we found me a knew doctor and within 5 minutes of the visit she told me I had IBS-d. She also told me there was no cure. It would never go away. How devastating. The best I could do was avoid spicy food, chocolate, and fried food. She told me to eat healthier, workout, and take probiotics. I also got prescription anti-diarrhea pills and that was my future.

This affected all areas of my life! If my allergies got bad I had lots of drainage which would flare up my IBS. I had social anxiety which would flare up my IBS. Worrying about my IBS before social events flared up my IBS. Diary products and Fried food flared up my IBS. I spend the first 1-2 days of my period sick and in the bathroom(no work or school). It is all consuming and miserable.

Anyways at about 18, I decided to try this whole being healthy thing. I had a stressful full time job and was sick as a dog. Over the next 6 years, I have never stopped learning how to be healthier. I keep educating myself. I fall backwards sometimes and fail at times. I try things that don't work but oh man have I found AMAZING relief.

I have not needed to take an anti diarrhea pill in over a year. I no longer need the most expensive highest dose of probiotics to see a result. If I get a stomach problem it lasts less than an hour and a half. But that is rare and maybe every other month.

So what did I do? I went all out learning how to live a healthy life, which led to learning to live a toxic free and all natural life to the best of my ability within reason.

I workout 5 or more times a week.(nothing crazy and less than 50 minutes a day)

I eat healthy to the best of my ability at the time. Meaning what the budget can afford, what I have time to prepare, and accommodating what my kids like. I did not like it at first, but over time your taste preferences change! Here is proof: 100% I used to only love milk chocolate but now I hate it! I can only enjoy rich dark chocolate that is low on sugar. 

I am working to take the toxins our of my life one step at a time. It is an expensive job to do it all at once. But I do it slowly. If you don't know modern conveniences are taking a toll on our health. Its the reason so many of us are sick. So I work hard to take them out for my sake and for the sake of my children.

I work on my mental health. IBS and stomach disease work hand in hand with mental health. So I work hard on keeping my mind healthy.

I get into nature and get outside.

So here are my easy tips for you and places for you to find more info!

1.      Working out! Start simple. Find a Youtube workout video, join a gym, message that fitness person on your social media and ask for help, or just start going outside to walk.

2.      Eating healthy is a scary place to go. So many things can go BAD for you. So let me start with this! We are all different! Bio Individuality means no one way works for everyone! You kind of need to start dating diets, meal plans, and nutrition concepts to find what your body needs right now. Give it 30-60 days and if it doesn't help move to the next one. Here is some info on that. Info On Bio Individuality

3.      Toxic Free living can be accomplished slowly. Do not tackle it all in one day. Do a TON of research! I recommend starting with watching Down to Earth on Netflix and applying what you can from it. Next follow Darin Olien and dive into his website and podcast. From him you will learn of many other experts to research. Find him here.

4.      Work on your mental health. Like #3 there are so many options and not all are right for you. Meds, no meds, therapy, oils, books, mediation, and so on. Find what works for you! I suggest finding a meditation app you like. Also Dr. Caroline Leaf has amazing state of the art neuroscience on healing your brain health. Find Her Here.

5.      Get into nature and go outside! This is such a missing link in our daily lives and a huge reason for health problems. What can you take outside? Can you read outside, watch that movie on your Ipad outside, eat outside, or take a walk outside? Maybe start a garden or green house. And spend time barefooted in the grass, sand, or rocks. Connect back to nature and see your health change!

I truly hope you read this with an open mind and I hope it can help and inspire you to take control of you health! I haven't seen a GI doctor since I was 18ish. I haven't needed to. I took control of my health. Now I see other medical professionals like Chiropractors, Massage Therapists, Physical Therapists, and my PCP. But I am no longer tied to a GI doctor who gave me little hope. If you have any questions or would like to know more details about what I have done feel free to message me or post in the comments below. I realize that since I have been blessed with help and relief in this journey, I need to give back and help others!

 

Holiday Presents From Young Living 2020

First off I want to say thank you for Shopping Small. Thank you for taking the time to look into buying Christmas or Hanukah presents from someone other than department stores and big brands. I have created a simple and organized list of items you can get for each person in your family including: Oil Favs, Oil Accessories, Just Oils, Men, Beauty, Kids & Baby, Stocking Stuffers, and Gift Baskets. I will give you 2 prices options because you can easily get 25% off all products, just ask me how. I will also list a brief description. Be sure to reach out of me so I can help you order and get the best deal or if you are independent use this link to order.

Oil Favs

• Thieves Waterless Hand Sanitizer $6.91 or $5.25 This is an nontoxic essential oil infused hand sanitizer. 
• Cool Mint CBD 500mg CBD $104.95 or $79.95 Unique formula harnesses the full power of CBD and Peppermint and Spearmint essential oils.
• Sensation Massage Oil 8oz $49.01 or $37.25 Sensation™ Massage Oil inspires and encourages feelings of romance. Great gift for spouse. 
• Tranquill Roll On $40.46 or $30.75 Tranquil™ Roll-On is perfect for inviting relaxation into your life.

Oil Accessories 

• 30 Oil Case $52.30 or $39.75 This is the best oil case I have found. I always travel with it. 
• Southwest Sterling Silver Necklace $20 This elegant necklace was handmade by Navajo women.
• USB Diffuser Black or Purple $31.91 or $24.25 This diffuser functions as an air purifier and aroma diffuser in one simple-to-use product.
• Feather Owl Diffuser $68.09 or $51.75 This exclusive, custom-designed ultrasonic diffuser functions as a humidifier, aroma diffuser, night-light, and white-noise machine—owl in one!

Just Oils

• Panaway 5ml $49.67 or $37.75 This has been a must have in our wellness cabinet for back pain, cramping or, join issues. 
• Peace & Calming 5ml $47.70 or $36.25 This is a must have for anyone with kids, anxiety, depression, or needs better sleep.
• Stress Away 15ml $41.78 or $31.75 This oil needs no more explanation than the names. And yes it works like a charm. 
• Thieves 15ml $47.70 or $36.25 Google the story of thieves essential oil its great. This one is great for sickness and just what we need during the Covid 19.
• Peppermint 15ml $30.26 or $23.00 This oil can be used for headaches, stomach aches, to energize, and more. I use it so much it stays in my purse. 
• Ylang Ylang 15ml $57.57 or $43.75 This is oil is amazing for your mood and to help you feel closer to the ones you love. 

Men

• Shutran Beard Oil $20.39 or $15.50 This is a must have for all men. The oil blend has been described as irresistible by some women. Designed to absorb easily into hair and give it a soft, natural-looking shine.
• Shutran After Shave Lotion $36.51 or $27.75 This lotion soothes skin; has a clean, woodsy fragrance; and was formulated without synthetic, harsh, or harmful ingredients.
• Cool Azul Relief Cream $60.20 or $45.75 This replaces any pain cream you already use. It is so much better because it truly works and you only need to apply 1-2 times for the pain to subside. 

Beauty

• Very Merry Vanillamint Collection $65.46 or $49.75 With the gentle massage and exfoliating effect of pink Himalayan sea salt combined with deeply moisturizing mango seed butter in the body butter, your skin will look and feel silky smooth.
• Drops of Joy Diffuser Earrings Collection $46.05 or $35.00 These enchanting diffuser earrings are handmade by jewelry makers in Old Delhi, India, who combine their profits to sponsor the education of girls in their community. You also get a bottle of Joy Essential Oil to put onto your earrings. 
• Tea Tree 15ml $36.51 or $27.75 This oil is amazing for skin care. 
• ART Refreshing Toner $33.88 or $25.75 In a matter of seconds, a simple sweep of ART® Refreshing Toner can help balance your skin’s pH levels, reduce the appearance of pores, and completely remove any residual particles that cleansing may have missed.
• Essential Beauty Serum $28.29 or $21.50 This oil blend is perfect for adding to a bath to create soft healthy skin.
• Satin Facial Scrub Mint $23.03 or $17.50 This is my favorite facial scrub. It leaves me feeling clean and energized. 
• Stress Away Relaxing Bath Bombs $35.20 or $26.75 Stress Away™ Relaxing Bath Bombs are a fun, fizzy way to unwind. 
• Mirah Shave Oil $31.91 or $24.25 This is the best nontoxic shave oil. No razor bumps and no need for lotion. 
• Lavender Hand & Body Lotion $28.95 or $22.00 Lavender Hand & Body Lotion is a calming, hydration moisturizer made with plant-based ingredients and infused with Lavender essential oil.
• Lushious Lemon Foaming Hand Soap $19.41 or $14.75 The invigorating fragrance of lemon uplifts the spirit while our trusted plant-based formula leaves your hands feeling soft and refreshed. 

 Kids & Baby

• KidsScents Roll on Collection $256.58 or $195.00 Your children go through a lot in a day, so Young Living is introducing the ultimate parenting tool kit with our KidScents® Roll-On Collection. You get GeneYus, KidPower, Owie, SleepyIze, SniffleEase, and TummyGize.
• KidsScent SleepyGize 5ml $23.68 or $18.00 This is the oil I diffuse and dilute and put on the bottom of my kids feet at night. 
• KidsScents GeneYus 5ml $61.51 or $46.75 This is the perfect oil to diffuse while homeschooling to encourage clear thoughts and a focused mind.
• Seedlings Calm 5ml $17.43 or $13.25 This was formulated for littles to use diluted to sooth infants to toddlers. 

Stocking Stuffers

• Thieves Polar Pals $31.58 or $24.00 Help Santa’s little helpers stay clean all season long with our set of three Thieves Waterless Hand Sanitizers. 
• Christmas Spirit 5ml $14.47 or $11.00 I diffuse this oil all year long. It is so uplifting and energizing. 
• YL Vitality Drops 4 Pack $49.01 or $37.25 2 Grapefruit and 2 Lavender Electrolyte drops to add to your drink. Formulated with naturally occurring electrolytes from the Great Salt Lake and all-natural flavors, including Vitality essential oils, a few drops of YL Vitality Drops will keep you hydrated and feeling great! ($9 a bottle)
• Ningxia Nitro $54.28 or $41.25 This is a natural energy shot infused with essential oils, botanical extracts, D-ribose, Korean ginseng, and green tea extract. It is a great substitute for an energy drink or shot and it is only $2.75 a serving! 

Gift Baskets

• Thieves Home Cleaning Kit $109.21 or $83.00 KIT COMPONENTS: Thieves® Household Cleaner, Thieves® essential oil blend, Citrus Fresh™ essential oil blend, Lemon essential oil, Pine essential oil, Purification® essential oil blend, Essential oil carrying case, Stainless steel bucket, Amber glass spray bottle, Cleaning cloth, and Cleaning recipe booklet.
• Seedlings Gift Bundle $162.17 or $123.25 The Seedlings gift bundle includes: Seedlings Baby Lotion,  Seedlings Baby Oil, Seedlings Baby Wash & Shampoo, Seedlings Baby Wipes, Seedlings Diaper Rash Cream, Seedlings Linen Spray, Rope basket,  Hooded bath towel, and Washcloth.
• Bon Voyage Travel Pack $77.30 or $58.75 The Bon Voyage travel kit includes: Cinnamint Lip Balm, Genesis™ Hand & Body Lotion, Lavender Conditioner, Lavender Shampoo,  Morning Start™ Bath & Shower Gel, Thieves® AromaBright™ Toothpaste, Thieves® Dental Floss, Thieves® Fresh Essence Plus™ Mouthwash, Thieves® Waterless Hand Purifier, and Young Living toothbrush.
• Vitality Culinary Kit  $116.12 or $88.25 CONTENTS: Peppermint Vitality, Lavender Vitality, Cinnamon Bark Vitality, Oregano Vitality, Orange Vitality, Rosemary Vitality, Stainless steel mixing bowl with silicone lid, Stainless steel and silicone kitchen utensil set (whisk, spatula, serving spoon, and scraper), Bamboo oil rack, and Vitality Culinary Cookbook.
• Essence of The Season $112.17 or $85.25 Essence of the Season™ lifts spirits with festive, seasonal scents. Containing Christmas Spirit™ essential oil blend and the biblical oils and gum resins of frankincense and myrrh, this collection can be used during the holidays or year-round to invoke memories or enhance spiritual awareness.

I hope this helped you find some awesome nontoxic and truly useful gift ideas for your family and friends. I am starting a new trend in my family to stop give junk gifts. I want to give useful items and nontoxic items. The big area for this is Stockings! Stockings are always filled with junk. This year I am doing all natural candy and treats and useful items in them. I gave 4 super cute and fun ideas for stockings! I hope you have a great holiday with your family. Please reach out to my on Facebook, Instagram or email at fitchickmissdeborah@gmail.com for more info or help choosing gifts.

The Vision for the Wild West's

There comes a point in everyone’s life where they realize all their hard work is getting them nowhere. That is where Daniel and I have found ourselves lately. You see we have these goals and dreams like everyone but we simply never get to a place where we reach them. Something always happens that gets in the way of our success. When I tell you something always gets in the way I am serious! We are talking pregnancy, alcoholism, job loss, lawsuits, totaled cars, flat tires, and medical bills. We can never seem to win. So together we have decided to take massive action towards our dreams. We are counting on you to keep us accountable.

I wanted to share with you our vision, goals, and dreams. Maybe it will motivate you to do the same, set a fire in your soul, or maybe you will hold us accountable which we need. I am going to be honest with you we do not have the typical modern day American Dream. Maybe that is why every attempt we made to settling for less than our dreams failed. Maybe God was seeing how long we would wait and how hard we would work for these dreams. Who truly knows? The best we can do is create a vision, a plan, and work hard for it.

Now I am going to be super honest and to do that I want to give you a mini back story so you don’t see us as an utter failure. Back in 2016 the 22 year old boy and 19 year old girl who were in an unhealthy relationship found out they were pregnant. They never once thought of ending the child’s life and from how they were both raised knew a single parent home was not the optimal option. They made it work. Daniel was making about $11 an hour and I was a part time waitress; we were in no way able to get our own place or live independently. Because of God’s grace and the generosity of my parents we were able to get married a month before David’s due date and lived with my parents. Due to all the insane roadblocks I mentioned above we have yet to be able to afford to move out of my parent’s home. We are so blessed to have never been homeless and destitute and it honestly is all thanks to them.

Now four years later we felt stuck. With the uncertain economic times, rising cost of living and childcare in DFW, and the waiting period while Daniel works towards him Journeyman Electrician we had to get creative and find a plan. We also found Dave Ramsey so feel free to call us CRAZY. I will start showing you this journey in our Newsletter and on social media. I give all the credit to my successful fitness journey to being able to share it with you and holding myself accountable. So I am hoping with my life goals that will help as well.

Now when planning for your future you do not start with step 1. To make a good plan you need to start with the end goal or the dream. The Dream for the Wild West’s is to own our own sustainable farm. Daniel wants to break horses again. He wants to hunt and fish as he pleases. We want to farm the land and raise an assortment of animals. We want to live sustainably and be good stewards of this earth. I want to make and grow more things than I buy. We want to have AirBnbs, an RV park, and maybe a store on our property. I’d love to employ single moms, single dads, young adults without a home, or families like us who need a fair chance at life and give them a place to live and food. I feel called to be a homeschool mom and can see us learning on the farm in such freedom. I have wanted this since I was a little girl. Unfortunately the only way to make this dream a reality is to inherit land or work extremely hard to afford it. No one I am related to owns land so that one is out of the question.

We get to the hard part question: how the hell are we going to manage this? We cannot afford an apartment or house in a remotely safe part of town. For that matter we could barely afford to live in the ghetto. We thought about a mobile home and a little piece of land to start or a mobile home park for a while. But that would be a money pit and not a good investment. So we decided to be radically crazy. Our goal now is to pay off all our current debt and make our bills as low as possible. We then want to buy a truck and a camper. Now before you go thinking how trashy this is humor me. Go look up these hashtags on Instagram: #fulltimerv , #rvlifestyle , #homeonwheels , and #rvlifewithkids. Pretty amazing right? I have connected with a bunch of women that live full time in RVs with their families. I have been asking all the questions and we really have a positive feeling about this.

There we go I said it out loud The Wild West’s want to live in a camper! Now comes the work. We want to be in our camper in under a year. That means over $10,000 to pay off on our Jeep, a down payment on a truck and camper, and a healthy savings. Below I am sharing with you my vision board. We needed to see what we are working towards. Too often sleep, the tv, or other distractions get in the way of the work. Now we will wake up each morning and see what we are working towards. We hope you will wish us well and support us in this journey. It is going to be hard, wild, and such an adventure.

Five Tips for Reclaiming your Intimacy Postpartum

It is sad how easily the thing that creates a beautiful life can be ruined after that life comes into the world. I was shocked when a poll came across my due date group on who had been intimate with their spouse four months after our due dates. Many women are afraid, have no desire to, cannot imagine finding the time or space to simply have sex with their husbands after childbirth. Obviously I suggest waiting the six weeks it is important for your body to heal. I found after time with my second childbirth it was very important to be intimate with my husband. It helped me not get lost in motherhood and feel like a beautiful woman again.

I share everything with you to help you. I did not do any of this after my first child and our marriage suffered greatly for it. I found very little info when looking for help after having my kids and was left to figure things out on my own and do tons of research. I am going to give you 5 tips to help you enjoy your postpartum sex life. I do include affiliate links and sponsored products as with all my other content. Purchasing from these links helps me to keep providing you with great content.

1. Create Time and Space for Intimacy. Find the time in the little gaps of your day. Get up early or stay up late. Also as a woman sometimes it helps to mentally get prepared and plan for it. You also have to create space. For those parent who co-sleep you need to find a way to have to you baby sleep in their own bed every once in a while. You also could put your child to bed early. It takes sacrifice but it is worth it.
2. After having a baby your body does not just bounce back. We all know that from are stretch marks and weight gain. For those problems we get cream to fade the marks and we workout or eat healthy to lose weight. But somehow we expect our lady parts to recover on their own. It does not work that way. I highly recommend doing pelvic floor exercises daily. I used this video to guide me. I also did 2 belly dancing classes virtually and I was incredibly amazed as to how much it engaged the muscles that had not been engaged since childbirth. I highly recommend taking a belly dancing class in person or online. I took lessons with these two amazing ladies: Amayah and Janelle. Trust me it is well worth your time and money. Getting your pelvic floor working properly again is key.
3. Let's talk lube. I never listened to the doctors when they said you must use lube after childbirth. I mean its sticky and yucky. EW! Anyways I found a product that is all  natural and works better than anything I have ever tired on the market. It is called Coconu. Coconu values integrity in their products and use only plant-based and non-GMO ingredients. They use the same guidelines for the food I eat in the products they make for our bodies. The Coconu products are made with ingredients like coconut oil, beeswax, cocoa butter, and shea butter. Now what does all this mean on a tangible level. It is not messy or sticky. It is extremely moisturizing and soaks into your skin eventually, which makes for an easy clean up. Personally I like it better than unnatural lubricant. There are two type: water based and oil base. Both have the same ingredients they just have changed the base ingredient water or oil. The oil based lube is our favorite. It is smooth and takes a longer time to soak in. The water based lube has almost a cooling effect. It is very moisturizing but does not last quite as long as the oil based. Daniel and I both can tell a huge difference when using it. I highly recommend getting both to try out here, by doing so you get to support a small business. I also want to give you 15% off by using my code THEWILDWESTDEBORAH
4. Essential Oils were a huge key in getting my body back to normal. I used the Lucy Libido says There's an Oil for THAT: A Girlfriend's Guide to Using Oils Between the Sheets. It was an incredibly helpful book of ideas. They are all tested too; not in labs but by women just like you and me at home. My go to oils were Sensation, Ylang Ylang, Progessence Plus, and Sensation Massage Oil. I do recommend using Young Living Oils because of their Seed to Seal promise. They are the only essential oil company to not use third party farms. Their oils come from their own farms all over the world. They are completely organic and you can visit any of their farms and see for yourself their quality control. I want the products I use on my body and my family bodies to be 100% safe. I only trust Young Living with that job. If you want to become a member and get 25 % off all oils sign up here with your custom starter kit! Once you do sign up as my client I would love to get on a Zoom call with you and teach you about the oils and get you a custom plan on how they can help you. 
5. Take the fear out of sex. Come up with a birth control plan. I have had too many good times ruined because I was freaking out about not using any protection.  Fear is the bedroom is the quickest way to ruin a good time. Talk about it with your husband and make a plan.

Now that I have given you these 5 tips I want to encourage you to pick at least 3 if not all 5 to implement. It is important that you not just read this blog but take action. I am proud of you for researching and trying to find a solution but action is required. I want you to have a great intimate relationship with you spouse and it starts with action. If you liked this content please share it with a girlfriend who need to hear this.

Top 5 Uncommon Nursing Favorites

Before I started nursing, I researched everything that I might need. I got my Boppy Pillow, Bamboo Nursing Pads, Medela Pump, Milk Storage bags, and a  ton of button up shirts. I felt prepared. In all reality I ended up needing different things. I hated only wearing button up shirts. I ended up getting a second kind of Boppy for more comfort. I have fallen in love with some products in my three years of nursing and I wanted to share them with you. I hope that with this I can empower and provide more resources for other nursing moms. Now I hate blogs with a ton of puff before getting to the meat so lets jump right into the list. If you do want to purchase any of the products please click on the picture to order it does help support my blog and keep me being able to help you.

1.       Best Latch Boppy Pillow: This pillow transformed the ease of breastfeeding for me. I no longer had to slouch over or get into extremely weird positions. This is great for women with small breasts that cannot stretch towards your baby. Yes, it is big but it makes life amazing. I have since tried many other pillows borrowing from friends and so on. By far the Best Latch Boppy Pillow is the best.

2.       Women’s Nursing Tank: This is my favorite nursing tank. I used this in the early months when people were around and it helped a lot. When you and your baby are still getting comfortable latching you do not want to use a cover. I still at times wanted to be modest and with this tank you could be extremely discrete while nursing, but still see your baby’s face at all times. It is super comfy and you would not be able to tell it’s for nursing without knowing.
  

3.       Silicone Breast Pump: We have all heard of the Haakaa and I love the idea. I just could not afford the $20-30 for it while on unpaid leave from work. But I found one that is a knock off and works just as well. I love a good knock off. It retails at only $13.60. It even comes with a lid. I love using this after the nights my daughter sleeps through the night. Not only do I not get soaked with milk, but I can save it for her cereal or freeze it. No milk wasted! 

4.       Nursing Bras: Let’s talk nursing bra. First off I want to say I have bought them all. I got the cheap Walmart ones at first. I spend $190 at a special Maternity store for them. I have shopped at Target and Amazon. I have used them all. I must say getting a variety is a must. Your back will want something different at different times. I always switch out the style I am wearing. I recently found these on Amazon and they are the first nursing bra that makes my boobs look perky. They are even under $10 a piece. This is also while nursing my second child so that hard to even imagine that it is possible. The cup design is key. It’s padding has holes in it to keep its durability and its shaped in a raindrop style instead of a circle. I am truly in love. I do switch to my other bras still because my back will want something different. But this is my go to right now.

5.       Lactation Supplement Liquid: I am a little partial to this product because I got to be one of the first people to test it and review it. I was skeptical being the I think 4^th person reviewing this product. I have been amazed. I do notice a difference when I take it. You take 1-2 droppers a day by mouth for lactation support. I expected it to taste nasty. It ended up having a sweet flavor to it. Not only is it affordable but it lasts a long time. 

I truly hope I can help my fellow breastfeeding moms on this journey. That is one of my main goals in life is to empower women on their journey. It can be so hard at times especially on this breastfeeding journey. We all feel like quitting at one point. I have found that learning more and getting the right tools makes me feel empowered to be successful. Not only that being stressed out can harm your milk supply. I hope these products can help you on your journey. I try to provide you with budget friendly products. I know around my house we are on the Dave Ramsey plan and we try to keep our extra purchases cheap and to a minimum. I hated spending so much money on breastfeeding but it is always cheaper than formula. If you have to spend $200 to get set up to breastfeed it is still going to save you money. With all that said Momma you are amazing. I see you. I see how good you are doing between the messy house, dirty dishes, crying children, and aching body. You are succeeding. How do I know that? Because you chose to read this article and do research for your little ones. Good job Momma!



Be sure to share this with a friend who needs it. Also follow me on Instagram from more info on upcoming giveaways, accountability groups, and daily tips and encouragement. The Wild West Deborah's Instagram
Until Next time,

Deborah West

Surviving the Teething Phase

If you are reading this I am going to assume your little one is teething or have heard your friends talk about how bad it is. Teething is not only those days of nonstop tears and sleepless nights. Sometimes it is random days filled with drool, being fussy, wanting 100% of your attention, and wanting to chew on everything. It can test your patience. Not to mention someone is going to end up telling you that holding your baby all day will spoil it. But if you don’t you hold your baby it is constant fussing. Don’t worry mama the research shows it will not hurt your baby to hold them all the time. So go pick up your baby right now and hold them.


I am here to tell you that nothing is going to make this season go away, but we can make it easier. I have found a few things that help. Try them all and see what works for your little one. At the end of the day it will help you keep your sanity by trying different tactics. Nothing is worse than giving into feeling helplessness. So pick out a few ideas from my list and start finding a solution.

1.       Amber Teething Necklace: This may sound super “woowoo” to wear a necklace to fix pain but it works. When your body heats up the bead it releases an acid that is a natural analgesic. It ends up reducing pain and swelling. I love and use this one for Joann.

2.       Baby Bandana Drool Bibs: If your little one is anything like my Joann they drool like crazy. Joann uses between 3 and 9 bibs a day. She soaks through them so quickly. I have fallen in love with these for a girl and these are the boy version. Your baby will be happier with its clothes dry.

3.       Teething Toy with Clip: I have learned it is very useful to have a good quality teething toy to clip on your babies clothes. I have fallen in love the Dino Eggie Teether. Don’t worry it is BPA free and CPSC lab tested and approved. Joann loves it and can hold it by herself even at 4 months.

4.       Essential Oils: Essential oils have been a huge help for my two little kids. Make sure you buy therapeutic grade. I recommend using Young Living essential oils because of their seed to seal promise of impeccable quality. I use the oils: Seedlings Calming, Lavender, Frankincense, and Gentle Baby. If your little one is older you can use diluted Clove in their mouth to numb the gums. I apply oils on their feet and back as well as diffuse them.

5.       Baby Teether Toys: I love using these toys. I got these for Joann for Christmas. They are BPA, latex, and phthalate free. They have soothing massage points on the toys. My favorite part is that they come with a tub to store them in. Also two of them whistle! My three year old found that out.

6.       Breastfeeding Mom Tip: If your baby is eating less you need to be pumping. Too often Joann feels bad and will not eat. Of course my supply lowers. But in two days your baby will be just as hungry again so pump at normal feeding times.

7.       Relaxing Music: Play some relaxing music during this time. It will may calm the baby. It will for sure calm you. It will help you keep a level head.

I am going to leave you with some encouragement. This too shall pass, mama. Your little one will not be fussy forever. Each day you will get better at soothing your baby during the hard times. Motherhood is the ultimate job of service. You are that baby’s everything. No one can do a better job than you; and you are doing an amazing job. Just by reading this post you are helping your baby. Good job mama - you can do it!

“My Husband is so Lazy and Never Helps with the Kids or Cleaning!” Have you said this too?

I know I am not the only one who has been caught saying this. In fact I spent the whole first year of our marriage saying that all the time. It almost ruined us. In fact the only reason it didn’t was because I got a job and we became more like equals. Now I am back at home being a wife, mom, and homemaker. It can often feel that our husbands are lazy. I mean they get off work and sit on the couch watching The Mandalorian or playing video games. We have the overwhelming pressure to get dinner on, clean the house, wrangle the kids, and after doing all the things we are supposed to save energy for intimate time with our husbands. Let’s be real we almost never get all those things done successfully, instead it looks like utter chaos, an emotional breakdown in the kitchen, and by the time you crawl into bed your literally snoring the second your head hits the pillow.

We are over worked and underappreciated. So obviously this man who expects everything from us is lazy. He pees on the toilet rim, leaves his clothes on the floor, and thinks watching TV with the kids is a quality way to take care of them. What a lazy man! Why should we serve him? Why won’t he help us? Why does he get to be lazy and yet we are supposed to be freaking Cinderella. By that I mean a maid, last on the priority list, never has time for rest, and supposed to show up beautiful at midnight. Why would we every want to show him love?

Let me be real honest with you for a second. I want to ask you a question and then show you an alternative reality. Don’t close the browser give me a real chance. It will be worth it trust me. Ask yourself, “What do I do for him?” I am not talking about making him dinner, grocery shopping, cleaning the house, keeping the kids alive, and keeping the house from burning down. What do you do for him outside of your role/job as mother and housekeeper? What do you do for him as a loving wife? And no sex once a week in which you complain about and think about your to-do list during does NOT count. What do you do for your husband as a loving wife?

When we become moms we put our husbands on the back burner. He no longer gets our attention and love. In a marriage where it once brought you joy to cook and clean for him; you don’t feel like it anymore. In a marriage where once he came home to help you clean as fast as he could so the two of you could have a romantic night together. That reality no longer exists. It is gone. Both of you feel like the last man on the totem pole.

From a man’s perspective this is what he sees. He wakes up early to go to a job he hates, works long hours at, or is just plain stressful. He gets ready and goes to work and is lucky to get a kiss from a fast asleep wife. He throws whatever is in the fridge, sometimes only yogurt and fruit, into his lunch box because if he breaks the budget and eats out there will be hell to pay. He spends all day busting his butt working hard. He gets a few texts from his wife now and then, but when she has a question she won’t stop calling or texting in all caps. He thinks, “Does she not understand this is dangerous,” “I’m in a meeting,” or “I am not even near my phone?” But when I call her and need her because I am on my way to the ER, I need the kid’s socials for insurance, or I can’t remember what time my appointment is she never answers. He gets home to a house with a full mailbox and 3 Amazon Prime packages still on the doorstep. He opens the door to kids running around, toys are all over, the kitchen has dishes still from yesterday in the sink, the TV is on, and his wife walks up with a smile rocking a messy bun and sweats as she hands the baby off to him. He doesn’t get to even shower, change, or poop before he watches the kids. All he can see is a wife who cannot handle her responsibilities and shows him no respect for the work he does. He feels defeated and underappreciated.

Now that I have truly got your attention, let me tell you a super simple way to remedy at least part of this problem. Mama you have got to step up your game. Turn on something that gets you motivated. Listen to Rachel Hollis or Eric Thomas, whoever lights a fire under you. Get to work being a mom, homemaker, and wife.  Start by doing three things a day for your husband as a wife. You know what he likes and what will make him happy. One of the things I try to do for my husband is I wake up with him and make him breakfast, lunch, or both. Somedays I get dressed up just for him an hour before he comes home. I also will from time to time do come cute ideas from the Dating Divas website. I also will layout his clothes for him or have a snack ready for him. Figure out what will make your husband feel loved and do three of them a day. Make him proud that you are his wife. After you have done this for three weeks selflessly, with joy, and expecting nothing in return, reevaluate. Is he still doing nothing or has he began serving you too? If he still is not serving you, then talk to him out of love because you are now being the housekeeper, mom, and wife you are supposed to be.

You may say, “But I have too much on my plate,” “I am just too tired,” or “you have not met my kids.” Girl, this comes from someone who was the messiest person ever; ask my family. Not to mention the fact that I do not enjoy cooking with kids around. It is next to impossible and so stressful. I used to be a competitive snoozer and would take a nap every afternoon. But guess what, I learned something new! I researched and found tips and tricks to make being a wife, house keeper, and mother easier. Do NOT settle mama! Your family deserves the best of you. All you need to do is find out how to give that to them. Start today by adding to your to-do list three special things for your husband. You can do this. Stick to this for three weeks.

If you need more tip and tricks to be successful at this wife, mom, and housekeeping thing be sure to follow me on Instagram. There you will get my daily tips and get notified each time my weekly blog post comes out. You can follow me  on Instagram here. I truly hope this will help you as it has changed my marriage.