Is it Worth it to Make Plans or Goals as a Mom?

All our lives we are put on a schedule, we make goals, we have planners, we create dream boards, and we reach for the stars. But when entering into motherhood those plans, goals, and schedules get lost. It may happen as early as that first trimester when you are throwing up nonstop and can’t eat all day. If not then maybe in your third trimester if you get put on bed rest, you’re a swelling, you are tired, and nothing seems to get done. Now let’s assume for the 10% of the women left it hits when baby gets here. You are now waking up every 3 hours, you are recovering from a C-section or Vaginal tears, or you have a baby who only wants to be held. At one point in your motherhood you are bound to give up the structure. Its motherhood, it is okay.

Once you give up the dreaming, the goals, the structure, and organization your days are going to blend together and feel wasted. It seems fun at first binge watching Netflix and snacking all day. But after a while you may get depressed or feel lost. It is time to dream, plan, and make things happen again. But how do you do that as a mom when “something” always happens. I am here to walk you through my process.



Step One Start Brainstorming


You need to brainstorm some ideas to start. Pick a certain amount of time. For me it is January so I am planning out the whole year’s goals. Feel free to plan a month at a time or a quarter at a time. Now get some paper and write down anything and everything you would like to happen during this time. Think of goals for your children and how you want to raise them, financial goals, spiritual goal, learning or self-development goals, giving or volunteering goals, travel goals, physical goals, social goals, and career goals/money making goals. You can dream a little bigger than normal on some of these because once you have your list you are going to choose the ones you deem worthy of committing to.

Now that you have your big list you pick the goals or items that you want to do this for this season of life. You may be able to do it all or you may realize somethings won’t fit into this year or aren’t important enough to work on. Rewrite that list and choose the ones you really want to accomplish during this time. Don’t throw away the big list keep it and after your end date you may be ready to try on those goals.


Step Two Cast your Vision


Let’s make a graphic that will remind you of your vision. In this tech age most find it easiest to edit a collage to become your phone wallpaper. You can also go old fashioned and make one on poster board or paper. Create a graphic that will make you dream. Create a graphic that will make you push through the hard days. Here is an example of my phone background for this year. On it I use tons of pictures I found on Instagram or interest. Picture one represents my goal of staying on the Baby Steps and Budgeting. Picture 2 is a graphic from my blog to remind me I want to create a new blog weekly. Picture 3 is to inspire me as we move into a new space this February to create a farm house, minimalist, and Montessori style space. Picture 4 is to inspire me to hit business goals and earn a trip to Florida with my team. Picture 5 is to inspire me to go travel this year mainly in the form of camping. Picture 6 is to inspire me to work hard in my business as well and go to our annual leadership event. Picture 7 is to inspire me on my breastfeeding journey and at least breastfeeding till one year. Picture 8 is to inspire me to have one date night a month. Picture 9 is to remind me WHY I want all of that.

Credit to photos(Pic 1 @thebudgetmom , Pic 3 Natasha Hello Happiness , Pic 4 @Jatanajackson , Pic 5 @mason_camping , Pic 6 @Teambeachbody411 , Pic 8 @datingdivas)

Step Three Make Action Plans


Go through the list of things you want to accomplish this year and find the items that are going to need a plan in order to achieve them. Examples of items on my list that need a little more detail: Start the Baby Steps, Blog Weekly, Create a Farm house/minimalist/Montessori loft, Launch a Website, and 1 Date Night a month. There was more to be planned than just doing them. I have used many tools in learning how to reverse engineer projects and goals. I would love to share a few with you so you get how to do this.

1.       The PUSH Journal is one of my favorites. I have used three of them and they are amazing for pushing towards BIG goals. It lays out for you the exact steps for getting to your goals. I have achieved amazing things when using this journal. I highly recommend it for anyone who has big goals because you are going to need to take goal planning further than the average mom. You can grab yours here.

2.       Jenna Kutcher is one of my all-time favorite teachers. I had to share with you her blog/podcast on Reverse Engineering your Goals. Its dynamite. You can check it out here. https://jennakutcherblog.com/reverse/

3.       If you want to be super simples this is an amazing way to really nail down some details to your goal. It is using the SMART method. Check it out here. https://www.pinterest.com/pin/754493743808762566/

Step Four Getting Accountability 


You have made some amazing goals now. I know you can do this but you are going to need help along the way. Find certain people to hold you accountable and check in on you every once in a while for each goal. Let me help you see how I am picking people. I want to have Date Night every month so I told Daniel to keep me accountable. I wanted to work on becoming closer to God so I joined a Bible Study and shared that with my sister who is a leader at her churches women’s ministry. So if I skip she will bug me into going back. I have income goals for my business so I will be sharing them with my business mentor. Pick someone who is passionate about that goal for you as can be. Pick someone who is comfortable calling you out. Pick someone who truly care about you.



Step Five Take Action


Congrats you have created goals. You have cast your vision and set it into your mind. You have made detailed plans to help you succeed. You have put your goals into the world and have people walking with you. How does it feel? Now do not rest and think that you are done. You have so much more to accomplish. It is now time to go out and crush your goals. Be okay if you do not hit your deadline or if a few days seem to fail. It will all be okay. You will get more done with half ass effort than no effort at all. You can do this. If you need help on organization I want to recommend the Top 3 planners I recommend and love using.

1.       The PUSH Journal This is the best one for the go getter with huge push goals.

2.       The Rustic Daily Task Planner This planner is forgiving and perfect for the busy mom and it is made by mom's small business. 

3.       Busy Bee Undated Planner This is a great organization planner for things that need to be dated. It is undated so you don't have to start at a certain time. 

I wish you the best of luck reaching for your dreams and starting to plan your life out. No matter how many goals you miss; your life will be better that it was before. This is an amazing choice you are making for yourself. Be sure to tag me on Instagram with your planners! @thewildwestdeborah

The Wild West Adventures 2019 Recap

If you were to ask me to sum up this pasts year or even the past five years I would have to say, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of time, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair…”Charles Dickens could not have described this season of life better. I would like to take you through all out big moments and show you the great events of our life during 2019. But before I do that I would like to preface it by giving you the raw truth of what was happening behind the scenes. So here we go, here is to being as transparent as I can be.

Last year was started with such hope. I had finally gotten the promotion I had been grinding for the past year. I became manager of my Palm Beach Tan store December of 2018. We knew with that income we would finally be able to move out of my parents’ house. This is the not so sexy reality of getting pregnant at 19 while working as a part time waiter and your boyfriend making $12 an hour. We could not afford anything. So since September of 2016 we have been so blessed to live with my parents. We could not be more thankful for their love and generosity. We truly believe that having season of communal living is so natural and we really have enjoyed it. But at the beginning of 2019 we could feel the tides turning.


In March we told the world we were pregnant with our second child. It was a complete surprise and it hindered our plans. We still had hope of moving into our own place somehow. Until we were hid with something that would change our lives for well who knows how long. A moment of being human and the results of living in an imperfect world, our lives changed. We had to go into a great deal of debt and have to live in waiting while the things out of our hands are figured out. We gave up on our dreams of moving out on our own for a while. My parents are so good to us and God has given them so much generosity for us. We truly are blessed. In the late summer of 2019 my parents began looking for a house with more room for us. It was our sin and humanity that landed us with my parents but in our journey to follow God despite our previous bad choices; God has truly blessed us. In September, I gave birth to a beautiful daughter. During the winter months, I have come to realize going back to work for a married mother of two and no degree will be hard. I would need to make over $20 an hour to make a profit when you take away childcare expenses. It has been a really hard year. It has had amazing jobs with the birth of a child, creation of good friendships, and families love encompassing us; but it was not the year we dreamed.

Why don’t we dive into the fun moments? I will go month by month.


January was simple. We spent time as a family. We grew in love. For the first time in a long time I felt a deep closeness to Daniel and our love for each other grew. We took David fishing for the first time. Enjoyed welcoming Islay Grace into our lives. We rooted for the Cowboys together. I got to my best physique. It was a beautiful month.

February was a month of change. This was a month of me feeling incredibly sick. I had morning sickness and was having to hide it from my coworkers. Funny story, I had a feeling I was pregnant but what girl doesn’t have those a couple times a year. The best thing to do is test and find out; because most the time it is negative. I was at work when I tested. Later that night I get a text from one of my employees saying something like Oh my gosh I found a positive pregnancy test in the bathroom trash. Anyways I had to remind my employees that we must be respectful of others privacy blah blah. So the girls kept asking me every time I wasn’t feeling well if that test was mine. I spent the month of February lying to my coworkers and best friend at work. That was hard but a good story looking back.

March was when we got bold. We told my family and announced it to the world when I got to my second trimester. We got overwhelming support from family and friends. I changed my look and cut my hair. It felt so good to look like a new person again and match this new season of motherhood. We found my midwife during this time and decided to cash flow our baby’s birth. It was such fun touring birthing centers and I am so happy with the one I chose. It led to an amazing birth experience. This was also the month hardship struck. Our marriage got hard and my anxiety got worse. But as always God prepares us, I placed an order at the end of this month for 6 months of the Date Night in a Box membership. So before we went into a lot of debt God made sure our marriage was invested in.

April came and with it came adventures and the reigniting of my love for health and wellness. We got to explore the Dinosaur exhibit at the Dallas zoo. David was in awe and loved every moment of it. He is still obsessed with dinosaurs. We had an Easter Hunt with Daniels family and got to see David enjoy life. He really gained so much personality and desires for life this month. Towards the end of the month I started eating healthy and working out again. I had to if I was going to surviving working on my feet as a manager till I gave birth. I felt my cup start filling up again and my passion for life reignited.

May was a mix of joy and struggle. We got to enjoy my sister and her family come for a visit. We got to take her to see our sonogram as well. This was when my sister and I really started talking about her coming down to help me during labor. My Birthday came and I was so thankful for my mother who worked hard to make it special for me. Daniel and I were so stressed out and busy with life we did not get to make it a priority. If you know anything about me Birthdays are incredibly important to me. So that was a blessing.

June was a month of celebration. We had my gender reveal party. It was an intimate gather and I felt the overwhelming blessing of those who chose to come. It was a girl we found out. I could not have been happier in that. This month I had a very hard day and my sweet husband sent flowers to me at work. The note said, “From your loving husband. I hope this makes you feel special. I just want to let you know that you’re the flower to my world.” It still makes my heart melt.

July was a good month. We got a weekend alone to bond as a family while my parents traveled. We finally did our first Date Night in a Box and it reignited out passion for each other. Even Daniel will tell you it was a huge help. We ended up sharing a video of out date and won their monthly contest and with that got a $500 gift card to Ticket Master. That led to so much more fun this year. I started glowing this month. I got to fall in love with Joann. I fell in love with her name to and how God spoke to me through it. Her name means God is Gracious or Gift from God. She truly was just that. We did not know we needed her and again were not ready for a baby; but she was truly a gift. I think a big take away for me this year was that God has a big plan and it does not fall into alignment with my visions. But that is the good thing because his plan is better.

August brought more blessings. had my baby shower. I was blessed with all the gifts and over 6 months of diaper and wipes funds. I was grateful for the family and friends that came. I also got to be a influencer for Village Natural Therapy this month. This really lite my fire and helped mold my vision plan for the future. August came with scares. I had the fear of getting preeclampsia again. My BP kept rising, I kept swelling and I became miserable. I had to re-staff my store this month and the stress was overwhelming. I wanted to give up and quit. But I knew my family needed the money so I held on.

September was amazing but by far one of the most emotional months. I had moments of pure bliss and moments where I locked myself in the bathroom at work crying from a broken heart. I got to be in a maternity photoshoot which would have felt like a dream but unfortunately I had to work a 12 hour shift the night before due to an employee quitting. My mother got me through it and I ended up with some good pictures when they got me to fake a smile. That next week I was training new people and working crazy hours. I had two more people quit and I realized I couldn’t do it anymore. My BP was all over the place. I was swollen and had to do many remedies to help keep it down so I could walk. I would feel dizzy and exhausted. Working alone was my biggest fear. I ended up quitting which was a blessing. My midwife a few days after I quit tested me for Preeclampsia based on high BP. My sister came down to be with me because I thought I was going into labor. I wasn’t but my body was getting ready. The tests came back clean but based on how bad I was feeling we came to the decision to let my midwife break my water. I was 38 weeks and ready to have a baby. With my induction with David he came out 5 hours after they broke my water when nothing else moved labor along. The morning of September 19 we broke my water. We were expected to have a baby late that night, but Joann came fast and strong. My labor surprised us all. It was hard let me tell you but it came on so quick I truly didn’t have many chances for it to freak me out or give me anxiety for more than minutes. I will share my birth story this year. But it was an amazing experience. I am so thankful for my husband, sister, Islay, and mother getting to be a part of it.  Joann was a nursing champ. David was an incredible big brother with such passionate love for his sister.

October comes with blessings. The first day is my husband’s birthday so we get to start this month celebrating his life. We had a rough week with Joann getting bronchiolitis at 3 weeks old but we survived. Yet again I was blessed with food from family friends and my chiropractor. We got to celebrate my sweet David’s Birthday. We also got to celebrate Halloween. This by far was David’s favorite month. He comes alive with events, being around people, and holidays. He loves when we decorate and make things a BIG deal. It gives me such joy.

November came with finding myself while being a stay at home mom of two. I have learned to find joy in the chaos of motherhood. We spent Thanksgiving with family. Daniel got to take David to see the Monster Truck Rally with Papal. We are still retelling tales of this every day. The boys got to have such a great adventures. We were blessed with a good deal on family pictures as well this month. I would say November was a family focused month.

December was pure adventures. It started with seeing Disney on Ice. I braved it and took Joann wrapped in my Boba. We all had such a good time. I highly recommend seeing it. David got to see and play with Santa at the local play place and that was a big deal for him. I got to take my cousin Abi to see the Jonas Brother in concert. It was 10 years after my first concert with them. I enjoyed every minute of it and it made me feel young again. I highly recommend every mom go to a concert to feel young again. David and I crafted. We got to give cards to people in a nursing home and bless them. We got to spend Christmas with almost everyone in our family. We ended the year having a great day as a family. Daniel fell asleep on my chest while I was watching Friends for the last time as the New Year started.

Here is to an amazing 2019! I hope your year was as good as ours.

Switch up Your Thanksgiving Meat

If you are like my family you may be tired of having turkey every Thanksgiving. Not only is it exhausting to cook a turkey but it gets old. Say you buy a turkey it is freaking expensive. Every year my family starts and ends the Thanksgiving season complaining about cooking or eating turkey. Don’t get me wrong we eat turkey every week but on Thanksgiving it is getting old. Join my family in the decision to have a Turkey free Thanksgiving. You may ask now Deb, what are we supposed to eat now? Girl, I got you! I found some amazing recipes that are fun and different; but will leave your Thanksgiving guest extremely happy.



I have included a huge variety of recipes and meat. I got nitty gritty about including all types of meats. I also choose recipes that fit the fall menu pallet. I do not want to rock your boat and have you pair weird flavors with your Thanksgiving sides. Even if you still want turkey I encourage you to make one of these as well and see how many people at your Thanksgiving choose the alternative meat or both. It is a season of change in American, let’s change up the Turkey tradition.

1.       Maple Walnut Crusted Salmon: This is the recipe I am making this Thanksgiving. It has great fall ingredients and will wow your guests. Recipe Here!

2.       Dutch Oven Pot Roast: This is a simple and easy solution for your Thanksgiving. It also takes you back to the original Thanksgiving since they would have cooked in Dutch Ovens. Recipe Here!

3.       Venison Meatloaf: I love eating dear meat. Not to mention if you have a hunter in the family I am going to bet you have some deer meat sitting in your deep freeze right now. Congrats you are saving money this Thanksgiving. Your welcome! Recipe Here!

4.       Deep Fried Quail: This may be hard to come by. You could have some quail if your husband’s hunts or maybe your local health food store of butcher shop can sell you some quail. But deep fried quail is one of the most amazing things I have ever eaten. Recipe Here!

5.       Tomatillo Elk Verde Stew: You may be thinking I am crazy by all the exotic meat but do not worry chicken is next. Just stop and think about it what is more Native American & Immigrant Settlers than a hearty Elk Stew. Recipe Here!

6.       One Pan Apple Cider Chicken Skillet: This is for anyone who does not want to venture far away from the traditional turkey. You can sub it for Chicken with a good apple cider spin on it. Recipe Here!

7.       Fall Burgers: Thank you Rachel Ray! Yes, sometimes we just want a good old burger for Thanksgiving. Here are some fun fall burger recipes to do just that. Recipe Here!

I truly hope this has helped you. You and your family are going to enjoy this fun change. Be sure to let me know what you are cooking for your meat this Thanksgiving by tagging me on Instagram @fit_chick_missdeborah



Happy Thanksgiving!

The Medela Pump in Style Vs The Freemie Breast Pump

If you stumbled upon this you are probably lost in the decision of which breast pump to buy. It is a hard one. I took the advice of my sister the first time and it turned out very well. My sister always researched these kind of things. I got lost in all the recommendations. It was extremely hard to choose. The second time around I went with a new one I had been eye balling in the second year of breastfeeding my son and pumping at work. I mean why not I had my first one which still worked well. If all went wrong I had nothing to lose. I wanted to share with you my two experiences and a comparison chart.

My first experience was with the Medela pump. I was not able to get my son to latch at the hospital due to poor instructions and a very sleepy little boy. I was send home to pump and bottle feed him as well as supplement with formula. I was pumping often. The Medela was the perfect pump strength wise for this. It helped me get my supply up without successfully nursing. I used it after every attempted feed for the first few weeks and then as needed for the next two years. It did get old holding the pumps. I got very good at propping them up awkwardly on my legs so I could play on my phone or eat. They helped me be able to go to work and still breastfeed David. All in all the Medela pump was great.

My second experience was with the Freemie pump. My daughter was a breastfeeding champ from the start. I used the pump at first to help with my oversupply and release pressure. Then later on I pumped two to three times a week to have a supply if I wanted to go out or in case I get sick. The pump is amazing if you have a toddler. While using the freemie pump you can continue being productive. It is extremely important to boil the parts before use and follow the instructions. I had a little panic attack because my pump stopped working when really I should have just read the instructions. All in all the Freemie is perfect for someone who has a good letdown that can easily pump and for someone who wants to multitask. 

I wanted to compare and contrast for you the Medela and Freemie breast pump. I never exclusively pumped, but I did pump while at work or simply to have a supply if I needed to go out. I used the Medela pump for over 2 years. I have been using the Freemie for 7 weeks now. Both are amazing pumps but they have very different pros and cons. No pump is perfect for everyone. In order to help guide you in your purchase I want to give you my honest opinion on both pumps.



How is the Noise Level?

Medela: It can be super loud and at times for me it made slurping noises. This is not a pump to use in public unless you want everyone to know what you are doing.

Freemie: The Freemie pump is extremely quiet. If you were in a room with white noise or soft music playing you would not be able to hear it.



Is it comfortable to use?

Medela: It does not hurt at all to use and the settings are extremely customizable. It is a pain however to always hold them on or if you are good find an awkward way to sit where they balance on your legs or a pillow. Yes you can get a special bra or holder for them but that seems like a pain.

Freemie: It is slightly awkward to wear looks wise being that your breast size would have double by putting them on. It does feel super comfortable and is a gentle suction but effective. I do suggest you get a comfortable stretchy bra like this one.




How easy is it to use?

Medela: It’s easy to turn on and adjust the settings. But you are super limited as to what you can do while pumping. You can basically only watch TV.

Freemie: It is super easy. You do not have to stop what you are doing to use it. You just put it in your bra and keep going. You would not want to bend over but you can drive, work at a desk, vacuum, or walk. It is hard to get all the milk out, the pour option does leave behind about 5 big drops of milk.



How easy is it to wash?

Medela: It can be a pain. The little yellow piece always got stuck for me if I did not immediately wash it. I had to use pliers to get it off a few times. Other than that the other pieces are easy to clean and assemble.

Freemie: It is extremely easy to clean. It was a bit hard to put together the first time, but now that I have done it, it is easy. My husband will not try to put it together though it is a little intimidating with all the odd pieces.

I would like to end with who I think each pump would be good for. The Medela is great for a first time mom. You have no clue if making milk will be easy or hard for you and the Medela is a very strong pump and super adjustable. You can find replacement parts at your local Walmart or Target as well which makes it convenient. The Freemie is amazing for a veteran mom. If you have pumped before and know you have a strong enough let down that a gentle pump will work; get this one. It truly does make life easier. Freedom while pumping has changed the work load amount I can do. Most importantly momma I want to encourage you on your breastfeeding journey. As a mom who breastfed for 2.5 years with my first and am on week 7 with my second, it will not be easy but let me tell you it is worth it. It is worth it on a bonding level for you and baby, health level for baby, hormonal health for you, and weight loss help for you too. I am proud of you choosing to do this for you and your baby; you got this!

Top 10 Books for a 3 Year Old Boy

In honor of David's third Birthday this month I thought it would be fun to do a couple posts of gift ideas for three year old boys. My friend Amber put together a list of Usborne Books that she thinks would be perfect for three year old boys. I hope you enjoy learning about the books and share this with your friends who have three year old boys.

Here is the a little bit about the book expert and my Friend Amber:

My name is Amber Rieger and I am a consultant with Usborne Books and More. Last year my friend signed up, and though I had never heard of the books before, I was immediately hooked. I had a party and fell completely in love and ended up signing up myself. The rewards from my party were so impressive!  Deborah has asked me to write a post about book recommendations for her 3 year old son David. She wanted me to focus specifically on educational books. We have so many amazing options, that it was hard to narrow it down!!! 

I did my best to highlight some of our best series but also add in a little fun learning as well! 

Here are the books I chose: 

All You Need To Know Before You Start School 

This book provides a great overview of all the things a child needs to know before they start school! It includes things like counting and the alphabet. All are presented in a fun way by following around a set of five friends as they begin their schooling.

Companion Book: All The Words You Need To Know Before School 

Big Book of ABC

A great way to learn the ABC’s. It has beautiful illustrations that are also fun, thus keeping the kids interested as they learn. These are big books - literally - that offer interactive opportunities for learning. All of the Big Series are great, but the ABC’s are a great one to start with. There is also the Big Book of Colors and The Big Book of Numbers, as well as fun topics like Big Book of Animals and Big Book of Dinosaurs. You will love any book in this series!! 

Count to 100 

Gorgeous illustrations pair up with this awesome counting book. It has number patterns, picture patterns, and tons of things to point out and spot along the way.  Make learning counting fun and enjoyable. 

First Math Slide and See: Adding At The Circus

Kids get an introduction to adding with this fun board book that allows them to slide and see the answer to the equations. The picture changes as you slide it over to reveal if they got it correct or not. 

Lift and Look Tractors

Learn about different topics in this fun lift the flap series. The tractor book goes through common things happening on the farm. 

Bonus - there is a cute little hen named Henny to find on every page! 

Lift The Flap Very First Questions & Answers: What Is Poop?

Perfect for kids working on potty training, as it offers a fun way to learn the process. However, it is also a hit with kids who have already mastered that task! What kid isn’t fascinated by this process?! Especially little boys. This one is always a HUGE hit, and a best seller! 

My  Busy Day

A fun and interactive way to help kids learn an orderly day. This book will walk them through a day with tons of opportunities to interact as they go, via numerous flaps. Also has counting and matching activities.  

My Very First Animals Book

A great informational book to teach children about the wonderful world of animals. There are themes on different pages for them to learn about, like the habitats animals live in. Like most of our books, there is tons of things to spot and talk about along the way! 

Peek Inside A Tree 

This book offers tons of fun flaps for the kids to interact with as they read along or are read to. It keeps them interested while they are actually learning as well. The colorful flaps are so well done! Plus our flaps are very durable and stand up to lots of wear and tear. 

1001 Animals To Spot 

This one will provide endless entertainment. While your child counts along and searched to find all of the different animals, there is so many different ways to interact. It provides lots of opportunities to talk through  the things they are searching for or that are going on in the different scenes, which provides extra learning opportunities. 

Young Beginner: Bugs

A great book to help children as they get started reading. These books offer fun educational topics. They have simple sentences making it easier for young kids to understand as well. They are short and sweet. 

There are 10 books in the young beginner currently including topics like flowers, ponds, and dinosaurs.

You can go check all these books out and more right here.

Why I am Choosing a Birth Center

My Top Five Reason I Choose a Birth Center


There are many people that think I am crazy for going to a Birth Center for my maternity care. I get it I really do. I am a little crazy for wanting to feel the pain, paying cash up front even though I may end up going to the hospital, and for leaving behind the “safe way” of giving birth. This was not something I came to lightly. I wanted an un-medicated birth with my first child David. That went out the door when I had to be induced at 37 weeks due to preeclampsia. This time I did tons of research. I listened to the Birth Hour and the Birthful podcast weekly. I read tons of Evidence Based Birth articles, Spinning Babies articles, and blogs from other mothers. I spent hours on Youtube learning and hearing real life stories. During the whole process of learning I became interested in the natural birth process and even considered taking doula classes.



Anyways with all that said I knew that this was the option for me. It aligned with my values and goals as a mother. Even if people think I have a low pain tolerance (my whole family) I can do this. I will show them I am stronger than they ever believed. One thing life has shown me is that I am tough as nails and everything life has thrown me to drag me down I have faced head on with God at my side and come out a winner. Birth will not get me down. I believe God create children as a blessing. Yes child birth may be the most painful experience but it is ended with a flood of hormones and endorphins that fill your body with unconditional joy and peace. I am ready to give birth to Miss Joann Lynn West at a birth center.



Reason One: Breaking Free From the System


If any of you follow me or personally know me you know I do things outside of the norm. I like to be mindful about all I do and research to know my best options. The same goes with what I do for my children. I am one of those crazy moms that has worked out 5 days a week since the start of the second trimester. I also read labels of what I buy for my son. But what changed my mind about the process of birth is learning the history of the medicalized birth. I learned my Memaw was put under during the birth of her children. There was no immediately skin to skin or bonding. You just went under pregnant and woke up with a baby. Then you research a little more and listen to birth stories. I don’t know about you but I am a learner; so with all big decisions I educate myself.



The creator of the Evidence Based Birth Podcast just came out with a book called Babies are Not Pizza; they are born not deliver. It may seem like such a stupid title but it makes perfect sense. I highly recommend reading her book and watching The Business of Being Born to get a better insight on medicalized birth. Now I have nothing wrong with it. I am so thankful and bless I was able to be induced with David and that I did not die from preeclampsia. There were just so many things that could have gone better with the process. Simple things like training nurses how to do pain free cervical checks, allowing me to walk to halls to start labor instead of being stuck in a room, and I had to wait miserably for over 6 hours for my OBYN to come in to break my water because her babysitter broke her arm when the on call OBGYN could have easily done it. I could go on and on but that is in the past. I wanted care providers this time around that were trained in ways to make the process easier on me and not just easier on them.



Reason Two: Personalized and Supportive Care


If you have been following me for a while you know I like to do things as naturally as possible. If I get sick my first step is to try all natural remedies and if those fail or take too long to take affect and I have to work I will take medicine. I will suffer through a headache for hours trying natural remedies before popping a pill. I like to stay away from processed foods as much as I can. I use essential oils and supplement like crazy. Some would call me a crunchy mom. With that being said I wanted a care giver for this pregnancy that would support me in those beliefs. Last time with my OBGYN she supported me 100% but never gave me more ideas and natural remedies for my problems. This time it has been magically different. My midwifes have not only supported me but encouraged me to seek out natural care. They referred me to a Chiropractor, the Spinning Babies website, and natural supplements. This is the level of support I feel all pregnant women should get. They are extremely supportive of all my wishes I have had so far.



Reason Three: Easier Recovery


When having an un-medicated natural delivery your recovery time is significantly less. With a birth center as long as no complications arise you will go home in less than 3 hours after baby is born. I remember with David I was induced and hooked up to monitors and starving with nothing more than ice chips if I got lucky for 48 hours. After that I didn’t get up and walk after labor from pure exhaustion till a day after giving birth. Once I finally got home I could barely get up off the couch alone for a week. It was nearly impossible to move and yet I was expected to take care of a new born while barely functioning. Let just say I ate a ton of crappy frozen food and David and I stayed in bed.

With that being said from all the un-medicated birth stories I have heard recovery was much easier as long as no complications arose. I will be moving throughout labor and shortly after. I also will be able to snack and eat during labor so I will not have to starve like last time. Also when birth has no interventions you have this amazing hormone rush that helps you recover a lot faster. I am so excited to experience birth a whole new way.



Reason Four: Better Breastfeeding Outlook


Now this will have fact mixed with my mother’s intuition so if you are looking for pure facts here this blog post isn’t for you. Sorry sista! With David I was 100% onboard with breastfeeding. I had researched how to do it and was 100% committed to solely breastfeeding him. David was not able to latch good or even be awake enough to nurse. We have NO idea if he got any colostrum. He was extremely lethargic. It is a proven fact that boys born before their due date can be more lethargic. I also think the medications and epidural made him more lethargic as well. At the end of the day my baby was not awake enough to work for his food. Not only that after night one he was diagnosed jaundice and we did not get much skin to skin time. I had to listen to him cry and not be able to comfort him and they forced under the UV lights. They even gave him a pacifier without my consent. It was torture to a mom but pure agony and mental distress for me as a crunchy mom. I pumped and pumped after every feed feeling like my nipples would rip off just to get my milk to come it. He syringe ate my milk, but they said it was not enough. Finally to be released from the hospital we had to feed him a bottle of formula. This killed me.

Once I got home my milk came in but I had a nipple confused baby. All it took was one 15 minutes session with an amazing lactation consultant at WIC to get me nursing my baby. No one at the hospital even the lactation consultant ever offered me a nipple shield and that was all I needed. I felt unsupported in Breastfeeding at the hospital. Yes they showed me what to do and so on but not like they knew what they were doing. Once I met the lady at WIC everything changed. David and I successfully Breastfed almost 2.5 years. I am happy the birth center will not make me put Joann under the UV lights if she is jaundice. They will just suggest going out in the sunshine which is what her body truly needs. I am also happy my midwives are truly educated in breastfeeding and know the tips and tricks if problems do arise. An OBGYN never checks on that.



Reason Five: Empowerment


One thing I so often hear is how empowering birth can be. I was left after a traumatic birth and a failing first week of breastfeeding feeling depressed and like an ultimate failure as a mother. This is not how it supposed to be mamas. I struggled with having the motivation to clean or do anything more than just make David happy because in my eyes I had failed him in so many ways. Now I know I did not fail but everything in me told me I did. Like I said earlier with a birth that has no too few interventions you get a massive hormone rush postpartum to help your do your job as a mom and feel the right ways. I needed that with David. Call me crazy but in my eyes if you have had an un-medicated natural birth you are a powerful woman in my eyes. You embraced one of the most painful and hard challenge life has to offer. I think that is an incredible rite of passage. Now of course I think nothing less of mothers who had other birth experiences.



At the end of the day I want to have an amazing birth experience and I have done a ton of research into what choices I want to make for the birth of my daughter. Are all the choice the right one? NO! There aren’t perfect answers in birth, it simply hasn’t been studied enough. If you are pregnant or planning on having more children the best thing to do is research. Study all the options. Read books and take courses and be prepared for birth.



Here are some of the resources I used:

• ·         Evidence Based Birth Website and Podcast

• ·         The Birth Hour Podcast

• ·         The Birthful Podcast

• ·         The Business of Being Born

• ·         Spinning Babies Website

• ·         Babies are Not Pizzas By Rebecca Dekker PHD, RN

Easy 3 Step Mom Look

Let’s be 100% honest it is super hard to find the time to get date ready or dressed up for work as a mom. I have found an easy way to look put together without having to spend much time on it. I used to take 30 minutes to an hour to get ready. As a mom you do not have that much time or you have a sweet boy like mine who likes to dig in your make up and ruin it. Either way I like to get my make up on as quick as possible now. It has taken me a while to master a good at home look in a short amount of time but I have found a keeper. I can get my hair and makeup done after my shower in less than 15 minutes.

Step One: Spray your hair with Beach Babe Texturizing Sea Salt Spray and comb through with a Wet Brush. This will help keep your hair straight and looking good. You can get the spray here and the brush here!

Step Two: Use a tinted moisturizer for your face. Right now I am using Maybelline Dream Fresh BB Cream Sheer Tint. I have started using a tinted moisturizer rather than foundation because it saves you time and looks a little more nature. You can choose your shade and everything with the one I use, go try it out here!

Step Three: For my eyes I use only three products. I use my go to Urban Decay Eye Shadow. I like a sparkling light pink for my eyes. I then put on my mineral based mascara  on; I use whatever Sprouts has in stock. I use a mineral based mascara to keep my eyes from having an allergic reaction to mascara during the day. My eyes are super sensitive to the chemicals in mascara. I then finish the look off with Urban Decay Naked Illuminated Shimmering Powder For Face and Body from my lids to brow.

Now if you are anything like me your go to excuse for not getting pretty was no time with being a mom; you 100% cannot use that excuse anymore. I had to look date ready for work and always ended up doing my makeup in the car or at work. Now that I have simplified the process I can easily get ready every morning. I would love to see your results with this makeup routine. Please send me a pic on Instagram, Here. Don’t worry I won’t share it with the world; unless you want me to!